When it comes to anal play, there's no such thing as too much lube.
Lube is great for taking the friction out of all kinds of sex, but when it comes to anal sex, lube is absolutely essential. Unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't self-lubricate when you're turned on, which makes it difficult and painful to insert anything—from a pinky finger to a penis—without some extra help.
But which lube works best for anal sex? There are sooo many different personal lubricant products on the market, but when it comes to anal sex, you want to use thicker lube that doesn't require constant reapplication, explains Alicia Sinclair, founder of sex toy brand b-Vibe. "Silicone lube is one of the best lubes for anal because it contains dimethicone, dimethiconol, and cyclomethicone," she explains. "This creates a consistency that is thicker and more 'buttery' than water-based lubes. Most people find that they prefer a thicker lubricant for anal play because it gives some extra cushion to protect delicate body parts."
While natural oils (like coconut oil) and oil-based lubes have a thick consistency, too, they can erode latex, which is why Sinclair says: "It’s best to only use coconut oil or almond oil when condoms aren’t involved." But be careful about using silicone-based lubes with sex toys, she adds. "Using silicone lube on a silicone sex toy can cause bending, warping, and the ruin of a toy. Use a high-quality, water-based lubricant instead."
When it comes time to whip out the lube for anal sex, use as much as the receiving partner needs to feel comfortable, says Dr. Zhana Vrangalova, Ph.D., NYU professor of human sexuality and a sexpert for LELO. "Usually, especially for beginners, the more the better," she says. "I generally subscribe to the 'too much lube is almost enough' view when it comes to anal sex."
Don't be afraid to reapply "as soon as it seems like it's drying out and there's more friction," Vrangalova adds. "Keep the lines of communication with the receptive partner open. Encourage them to let you know when they feel more is necessary."
You'll notice the majority of lubricants on the list are silicone-based—the rest are either hybrids (meaning they're water- and silicone-based), or specific creams for anal stretching (i.e. fisting). FYI, the hybrids we included are safe for toy use and have a thicker consistency, which make them ideal for anal penetration.
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